I have stuck up with a big dilemma right now. I have been managing (ok, ok more like dwelling with it) my home with no domestic house help for all these months (again, its been 10months only now). Its getting so tough these days, everyone is suggesting me to get a servant-maid. The only prob being I am not very comfortable with the idea. All during my childhood I have dreamt of managing a home wonderfully, with no help from anyone. I have seen my mom do it and she is my true inspiration. Now that doesnt mean I am as good as mom. No- I can only try but can never do as much as mom does even now.
MIL is another instance - who manages such a big house with no help at all. She doesnt even prompt anyone with simple works also. If I go there, I would out of sheer interest take part in kitchen chores, then she doesnt stop me. I dont know from where energy flows in for these two ladies in my life. I feel so tired after each task that I would rest for sometime before proceeding or vent out my anger/depression to S. Forget energy man I feel so lazy!! Sometimes I feel like just putting both my legs up and sit on the sofa doing nothing! I can only wish though. There are other instances where I will have a very bad day at work, feel depressed and stressed out. On top of this, if I should come home and do some house work like, sweeping/mopping the house or doing the dishes - its so tiring. Other days, when I have terrible headache - I cant even think of going near the kitchen, forget doing dishes altogether! All these have a tough toil on S. We dont have a specific division of labor here - Do if you can, else the other one will take care. On days when I cant do some really important chore, S is being forced to do it - atleast for me! Bear in mind that he travels more comparitively and does work hard at office as well and some days, he would come home tired too. It becomes wrong on my part to impose household work on him on these kinds of days. It doesnt happen often but I end up eating my own guilt on these days, when he has already suggested like a hundred times to get househelp.
Result of all this - I cant do some tasks on day to day basis - like sweeping the home, cleaning the portico or folding the clothes. Other tasks (do or die kind of) like cooking, doing the dishes are a regular task. These days there is this additional problem - chilly chill Bangalore and that leaves me sick 6.5 out of 7 days. I dare not to open the water tap - for the water is ice cold. My hands are going numb while doing the dishes. There is so much dust everywhere in the house- which is again taking a toll on our health ( yes yes, S is slowing getting to be like me, after staying with me for ten whole months, poor guy!!! ). My mom is stubborn to the core that I hire a house help immediately. I cant get to think of it myself. OK, I am not a miser - thinking of this from money terms. But all I am thinking abt is - when my mom and MIL can do it perfectly, why not me (if not perfect?). Again, I am not that physically involved in any works as my mom or MIL had been. I am not convinced on getting a help, but looks like there is no choice - for my mom or MIL doesnt work whereas I do. That looks like more than convincing point that, I would get a house help soon.. Still in dilemma..
MIL is another instance - who manages such a big house with no help at all. She doesnt even prompt anyone with simple works also. If I go there, I would out of sheer interest take part in kitchen chores, then she doesnt stop me. I dont know from where energy flows in for these two ladies in my life. I feel so tired after each task that I would rest for sometime before proceeding or vent out my anger/depression to S. Forget energy man I feel so lazy!! Sometimes I feel like just putting both my legs up and sit on the sofa doing nothing! I can only wish though. There are other instances where I will have a very bad day at work, feel depressed and stressed out. On top of this, if I should come home and do some house work like, sweeping/mopping the house or doing the dishes - its so tiring. Other days, when I have terrible headache - I cant even think of going near the kitchen, forget doing dishes altogether! All these have a tough toil on S. We dont have a specific division of labor here - Do if you can, else the other one will take care. On days when I cant do some really important chore, S is being forced to do it - atleast for me! Bear in mind that he travels more comparitively and does work hard at office as well and some days, he would come home tired too. It becomes wrong on my part to impose household work on him on these kinds of days. It doesnt happen often but I end up eating my own guilt on these days, when he has already suggested like a hundred times to get househelp.
Result of all this - I cant do some tasks on day to day basis - like sweeping the home, cleaning the portico or folding the clothes. Other tasks (do or die kind of) like cooking, doing the dishes are a regular task. These days there is this additional problem - chilly chill Bangalore and that leaves me sick 6.5 out of 7 days. I dare not to open the water tap - for the water is ice cold. My hands are going numb while doing the dishes. There is so much dust everywhere in the house- which is again taking a toll on our health ( yes yes, S is slowing getting to be like me, after staying with me for ten whole months, poor guy!!! ). My mom is stubborn to the core that I hire a house help immediately. I cant get to think of it myself. OK, I am not a miser - thinking of this from money terms. But all I am thinking abt is - when my mom and MIL can do it perfectly, why not me (if not perfect?). Again, I am not that physically involved in any works as my mom or MIL had been. I am not convinced on getting a help, but looks like there is no choice - for my mom or MIL doesnt work whereas I do. That looks like more than convincing point that, I would get a house help soon.. Still in dilemma..
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